April 2012
cubic1es:
if mondays were shoes they’d be crocs
dallonweekes:
god is sending me a message via tinypic
inducing:
3 months later and i am still waiting for missing e to ruin my life
cannolis:
i wanna make love in this club
john-lydon:
if you don’t reply to me within 0.5 of a second i assume you’re too busy writing songs about how much you hate me or throwing darts at a dartboard with a picture of my face on it to type
genuinelycornflakes:
I’m gonna write Joe Biden/Barack Obama fanfiction and it’s going to be called forBiden love
jennycraigslist:
when im acting really sassy my mom tells me to “put a little less dressing on that attitude salad”
hiddlebumz:
cosmo tip #247
during intercourse, embrace him and softly whisper “are you feeling it mr. krabs?”
anrdew:
people that blame their lack of responsibility and bad grades on a blogging website
breadzepplin:
america’s funniest home videos is the-absolute-funniest-posts of tv shows
tim burton: johnny depp
bbboa:
i hope you have pet insurance because i’m about to destroy that pussy
straightwhiteman:
i dont like getting yelled at i literally stand there and burst into tears
abusivemom:
i wish i could drive a piano
muggleland:
i love the sense of community in the classroom when you all know you failed the test
spencreid:
once upon a time i was falling in love
now i’m only falling apart
snoopdeer:
why do porn websites have a +1 button i don’t want everyone to know i actually use google plus
divination:
my sim boyfriend woohooed w/ me then moved into another bed immediately after then DIED now he haunts my house and every time i try and talk to him he turns into dust ALL BOYS ARE THE SAME
soujizz:
taterlongs:
trying to decide on a title for my english essay
that works
i just got it back today
mission accomplished
shavingryansprivates:
i had a nightmare last night that canada was real
joloso:
little red raven from the hood
fugrats:
jesus dyed eggs for our sins
moshfranceschi:
hey i just met you
and this is crazy
but get in the fucking van
